What Has Two Thumbs And Hates The African Pregnancy Story – The Awl

2020年4月20日 at 下午2:48

Ihaveaconfessiontomake:IhavedeliberatelyignoredaremarkablestorythathasbeengrowinginpopularityacrosstheseInternetsbecauseIdidnotwantanyoneouttheretogetthewrongidea。

Youmayhavealreadyheardaboutthissomewhereelse,butontheoffchancethatyouhavenotIwillindeedabidebytheBloggerCodeofEthicalPracticeandshareitwithyou。

ItisanissueaboutwhichIhaveseriousreservations,butIamchastenedbyhavingbeenremissinmydutiesandIherebymakeamends。

Let’s?

begin。

In1988,a15-year-oldgirllivinginthesmallsouthernAfricannationofLesothocametolocaldoctorswithallthesymptomsofawomaninlabor。

Butthedoctorswerequicklypuzzledbecause,uponexamination,shedidn’thavea?

vagina。

“Inspectionofthevulvashowednovagina,onlyashallowskindimple,”sodoctorsdeliveredahealthybabyboyviaCaesarean,theauthorswroteinacasereportpublishedintheBritishJournalofObstetricsandGynaecology。

Herbirthdefect?

—?

calledMullerianagenesisorMayer-Rokitansky-K?

ster-Hausersyndrome?

—?

didn’tnecessarilysurprisedoctors,butherpregnancydid。

Eventhe15-year-oldgirlcouldnotbelieveshewaspregnant。

Yetbylookingatherrecordsthehospitalstaffrealizedtheyoungwomanwasinthehospital278daysearlierwithaknifewoundtoherstomach。

Theaveragepregnancylasts280days。

Afterinterviews,theygatheredthat“Justbeforeshewasstabbedintheabdomenshehadpracticedfellatiowithhernewboyfriendandwascaughtintheactbyherformerlover。

Thefightwithknives?

ensued。



Youcanimaginewhereitgoesfromthere:Scientiststheorizethat“spermatozoagainedaccesstothereproductiveorgansviatheinjuredgastrointestinaltract。



Thestoryendshappilyformostofthoseinvolved-”Theyoungmother,herfamily,andthelikelyfatheradaptedthemselvesrapidlytothenewsituationandsomecattlechangedhandstoprovethattherewerenohardfeelings。

”-butIwantyoutolistenandlistenclosely:Muchasitpainsmetosaythis,Scienceiswrong。

Youcannotgetpregnantfromablowjob。

Infact,studieshaveshownthatgivingblowjobsactuallyPREVENTSpregnancies。

Also,itpromotesweightlossandmakespeoplepaymoreattentiontoyou。

Thereisnopossiblewaythattheactofperformingoralsex-themostselflessyetrewardingactapersoncanperform-willresultinyourpregnancy。

Idon’twantyoutobelievethisridiculousmedicalcuriositystorywithitsimplicitanti-blowjobpropaganda。

IknowthatSciencecarriesalotofauthorityaroundhere,andthefactsofthiscaseseemlikesomethingyou’rejustgoingtohavetositbackandtakeinbutthatdoesnotmakealickofsense。

Readers,believeme:Ifyouaregoingtoswallowanyorgan’sloadofinformation,itshoulddefinitelybe?